It's a Gregorious Life

Monday

Mandy was out back with mom and her brother today when I got there after work.

We moved to the front porch. Mom had on her new clothes Tim got her. I tried to get her to smile for a photo and barely succeeded.

She told me she doesn't like to smile. It goes back to an incident that happened when she was staying with her mother.

Someone said something funny and mom laughed really hard. Rudy's son Shane saw her and thought her teeth were big. "Wow you've got FANGS!" she said he shouted. It must have crushed her because she said "you wouldn't want to smile either if you had fangs."

Such a strong woman to still be hurt by a child's harmless content even at her age. Are any of us any less vulnerable, at any age ?

I remember being on the school bus in junior high and I was lip syncing a song on the radio as we all rode on the school bus. My friend Jackie looked at me an with such a blank, expressionless face said to me "you have a large mouth for a boy."

I've been insecure ever since. I said things to people at that age that I'm sure made them feel the same way.

Our struggle as believers is that after all the hurts of this life, many committed by those that portray themselves as righteous when really they practice selective literalcy, we know there is peace in the next.

The Weekend, January 27, 28, 29 2012

Mom seemed to have a pretty good weekend, staying pretty coherent and alert.

Friday she and Donald were in the lobby when I got there. She had therapy that morning and took a nap after lunch and thought it was another day, that was the only negative part. She said she had been on the phone with Batchie and was so tired she thinks she hung up on her. "I remember I went out in the hall asking people what day it was."

Saturday I went over about 1230 and took her a bo berry biscuit from McDonald's and some coffee which she had after lunch. We sat out on the porch for a while and she got some sun. She said Terry called from Gatlinburg. I left about 130 to get get stuff to fix Misha's grave with.

I went back after supper and she had took a nap but it had not messed up her days. She had a lot, pot pie and salad and diet banana pudding. She had asked for some shea butter lotion so I had gotten that while I was out but forgot to bring it in. When I went to get it David and Pat had just drove up.

Sunday I went over at 5 and told her I had an apple pie for her if she ate all her supper. She had stew beef over rice and some tomatoes and okra, no dessert.

I met her in the hall on the way to the room and gave her a lift. She liked the apple pie. She said she had a blister on her leg from sitting in the sun yesterday and the nurse had drained it for her. Terry called again. Lowell Presbyterian Church played bingo with them today but she didn't know until the last minute and didn't go. We were watching tv and she saw someone from Johnson and Wales in Charlotte and said they were the ones that fixed the omelette's the other morning.

She wants to read her diary next time she goes home. She said she should keep one now. "I have so many interesting things going on" she said, as she shook her head from side to side and closed her eyes.

We were watching Food Network and Taylor Dayne is on one of the shows. I looked up and played this song for mom; it's so beautiful and amazing and even though it's more than 20 years old Taylor still looks the same. It's a song that I really like and I dare you to click the link and watch the whole thing and not be moved. Mom listened to it and really liked her voice.

Then I heard a noise. I said was that your stomach or a car? Mom said it was her stomach. We laughed but I still think it was maybe a sound from a neighbor's tv. I hope so anyway because it was loud enough to be quite concerning.

Saturday

Okay so I went to Arbys on the way to moms about 130 to get lunch before going to Denise's daughters wedding. The speaker at the drive through says "this is a test message on the red network." I look and see a sign that says "please drive to the window to place your order." Well 4 other souls had done that and one was post-window, so I left and went to Wendys. I remember John Kerry's wife had never been to a Wendy's before the campaign. But that's another story.

So I go to moms room and she is asleep at 2pm. The sign said they were having singing by a group called Southland at 4pm. I ate lunch then she and I split a Frosty. She was mumbling at first because she had been asleep so it was hard to understand her.

She said Doris had gone home for a visit yesterday but came back and woke her up overnight calling for people. I told her I had a dream about her and dad and she said "did you see his face?" I told her I didn't.

I went to the wedding and it went well. Chris and Emily are a nice couple. They should go ahead and get modeling contracts for their children. It brought back traumatic memories of when I was a ring bearer for David and Pat, but there was no ring and no one would tell me why. Well today Paxton, Denise's grandson was the ring bearer and he didn't have the ring either. Apparently this is some heinous scheme by wedding planners everywhere to make sure there's at least one traumatized male soul at each wedding. Other than the groom.

Mom called me on the way back about 620. I stopped by there about 7 and asked her about coming to the house for lunch tomorrow. She didn't sound enthused but I guess it will happen. I called Terry so she's supposed to meet us.

Drake, Misha and Gus are all sitting here asleep at 918 pm.

Saturday

I have acquired a case of MRP. Major respiratory problem. I don't know if it's a sinus infection or cold but last night I coughed up a lot of phlem and it worsended. I stayed in and out of bed all day.

I called mom a couple of times but could never get her to answer. I went over to Eckerd on New Hope at Redbud and got some Chloricidin HBP. I saw the same pharmacist there that used to work at the one near mom before they closed it. He asked if I needed help but I said I was ok.

After that I called mom again and still got no answer. So I drove up in the circle to see if she was maybe in the lobby but she wasn't. I went to the parking lot and called again and she answered this time.

She met me in the lobby and I stayed away from her and everyone else. But we got to talk anyway. I told her about sliding down on the ramp last night when I took Drake out. I told her I had a dream about dad and her last night. We were watching a play in Wilmington, and turned out dad was in the play, as part of an audience participation. Back at the house he came to tell me something but I was listing to music on an ipod, and I didn't hear him. I followed him back down the stairs and asked him what he had said he just said "never mind, it's too late now." It was like he tried to tell me things in life but I wouldn't listen, and now I don't have the chance.

She said her eyes have been burning and her nose running for a few days. She said she told the nurse. I asked what did they say and she said "if I told them the sky was fallng they wouldn't say nothing about nothing."

She said she was just sitting there watching Animal Planet earlier and the lady next door screamed. She said she came to the dining room and yelled for everyone to get out. Mom said the dining room looks nice but it's too fancy for the old people. And the piano and mural are gone.

I'm (not) surprised no one scoots her back or tries to straighten her in her chair. She could probably be falling out and no one would do anything. There's still a few good people left there but they're overworked and it's not like it used to be.